Me and grandma in Israel a few years back. A few of the last pictures of us together before she got ill. It will be exactly 2 months in 8 hours and 20 minutes. And not a day goes by without thinking of her... or crying for her. The tears just become different.
This is from Morocco, taken a year after the picture from Israel. It was just the three of us there, also. Me, and my grandparents. I´ve gone thru old pictures lately... seeing them with a whole new perspective. Realizing how much she actually changed physically during the illness. That never changed my feelings for her. We even grew closer. I always thought that couldn´t even be possible as we already were so close.
It´s heartbreaking to see grandpa so alone...tears in his eyes. I wish I could do something to ease the pain. I feel like I can´t help anyone because I´m so messed up myself. Last night the tears just wouldn´t stop. I haven´t cried like that for weeks. I miss talking with her. Just seeing her close to me... I know thinking that I would give anything to be close to her once more is only torture, for me... It´s funny how I still feel like it´s been only a week since the last time I´ve seen her. Maybe it´s just my way of dealing this...
2 Comments:
each day will get better, but it's good to remember.
um, were you two riding on that camel? i'd freak out. what was israel like....? pretty cool you went to those places with your grandma. i never had a grandma so...you are very lucky to have those memories.
No, we didn´t ride the camels. I don´t really remember why but they didn´t smell too good...
I think I liked Israel more than Morocco. I had more activities there. We stayed in Eilat. We went on a cruise, to the coral island (it´s in Egypt) where crusaders built a fort to guard muslim pilgrims.. We saw three or four countries at the same time and I swam in the sea.
Post a Comment
<< Home